Babe, I know what It looked like but she was just changing my diaper.
If a woman says ‘do what you want’ do not do what you want. Stand still, do not blink, do not answer, don’t even breathe, just play dead.
When you ask your girl what’s wrong and she gets even more mad and says “you’re supposed to know”
Me: he apologized. I should just say okay & let It go. Other me: bring up that thing that pissed you off 3 weeks ago too. Finish him.
It wasn’t a fart… my lower intestine blew you a kiss.
I can’t wait for the day that instead of “ It’s late, I have to go. ” you will say “It’s late, let’s go to bed.”
One of the most amazing feelings In the world Is having someone fall In love with you who you thought you never had a chance with.