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Simpsons Quotes

by Smith on

simpsons quotes (1)

When a woman says nothing’s wrong that means everything is wrong when a woman says everything’s wrong that means everything is wrong.

 

simpsons quotes (1)

Maybe, just once, someone will call me “sir” without adding, “you’re making a scene.

Marriage is like a coffin and each kid is another nail.

Bart! With $10,000, we’d be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things… like love!

I’m not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I’m going to hell?

I’m having the best day of my life and I owe it all to not going to Church!

Donuts. Is there anything they can’t do?

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Lisa, if the Bible has taught us nothing else, and it hasn’t, it’s that girls should stick to girl’s sports, such as hot oil wrestling, foxy boxing, and such

Operator;give me the number for 911

I’m normally not a praying man, but if you’re up there, please save me, Superman. — Matt Groening

Marge, don’t discourage the boy. Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It’s what separates us from the animals!… Except the weasels.

Just because I don’t believe doesn’t mean I don’t understand

 

simpsons quotes (2)

And this is the snack holder where I can put my beverage, or, if you will, cupcake

 

simpsons quotes (2)

I have three kids and no money. Why can’t I have no kids and three money?

 

simpsons quotes (3)

Look, just give me some inner peace or I’ll mop the floor with ya!

 

simpsons quotes (3)

Stacy: Don’t ask me, I’m just a girl.

 

simpsons quotes (4)

I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life. Number 1: Cover for me. Number 2: Oh, good idea, Boss! Number 3: It was like that when I got here.

 

simpsons quotes (4)

Mindy, because of our uncontrollable attraction, I think we should avoid each other from now on.

 

simpsons quotes (5)

Deep Thoughts of Homer Simpson: ‘If something’s hard to do then it’s not worth doing.

 

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Trying is the first step towards failure  — Homer Simpson

 

simpsons quotes (7)

You can have all the money in the world… but there’s one thing you’ll never have… a Dinosaur~Homer Simpson

 

simpsons quotes (8)

Homer Simpson Operator;give me the number for 911

 

simpsons quotes (9)

I can’t take his money, I can’t print my own money, I have to work for my money. Why don’t I just lay down and die.

 

simpsons quotes (10)

Oh my God. The dead have risen, and they’re voting Republican.

 

See also:

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Written by: Smith